I’ve been in LA for over three years now. It kind of blows my mind that I’ve been here this long. I don’t hate LA, I’ve actually come to enjoy parts of LA quite a lot. One of the things I don’t like though is the cost of living here. One of the big reasons I’m still here, is that I haven’t been able to afford to move. I haven’t been able to save as much as I’d like to have since I’ve been here. Part of that is my own fault, spending money on things I don’t necessarily need and not prioritizing savings as well as I should. But part of it, is that I just haven’t had a lot left over after paying rent and bills either.
In the end, this has contributed to a feeling of being trapped here in LA. I don’t like that feeling. So I’m making it a goal to do something about it. The first step was to reexamine my budget and make some changes to prioritize savings more than I’ve done in the past. The second thing I did was open an account on SmartyPig. SmartyPig is essentially an online bank that offers savings accounts. While I already have a savings account with my local credit union and with ING Direct, and could have easily just used that to build up a “moving fund,” SmartyPig has a little different focus. It is a goal focused savings account. You set up specific goals and the time line you want to complete them in. What sets it apart from just your standard account is that it interacts in your social networks. I’ve connected my goal to my Facebook account, so everytime I add money to my account, it’ll post something on my facebook wall. I’ve also created a widget that I included on my blogs sidebar. The widget shows the percentage of progress I’ve made towards my goal. The other thing that is nice, is its easy for friends or family to contribute to that goal if they so choose.
The goal I created is this:
My goal is to save up $2500 by June 30, 2011. This is based on what I estimate it would cost me to move back to Portland. My lease is up at the end of July, so I’d like to have this fund in place by the time I’d need to put in 30 days notice. I’d still need to get a job lined up, but just having this money set aside for this purpose will take a lot of pressure off of me. I won’t feel as trapped here in LA.
Jonathan Pryce reads a newly rediscovered poem by Ted Hughes where he imagines his wife’s last night before her suicide.
A devastatingly beautiful intimate poem, not originally included in his Birthday Letters collection (though I imagine it will be added to a new edition).
“For some unfortunate reason, complaining, rejecting, or fearing something strengthens your sense of ego and makes you feel like you are important. You contract back into your small and false self, and from there, unfortunately, it becomes harder and harder to reemerge.”
The hard part (at least for me)
about breaking up is losing the friendship. If even just temporarily. Setting arbitrary dates of when you can touch base again and see where we are in life. But the thing is, you won’t be in the same place. I suppose that’s a good thing in some ways, as there’s a reason things had to change. But there is still a feeling of deep loss. Like the act of actively not talking to someone will just make that the new status quo. At the end of the arbitrary time, there just won’t anything left but awkwardness and bittersweet memories.
Obviously this morning was seeped in melancholy for me, and listening to the John Prine version of the below song probably didn’t help. But it sums up a little of what I’m feeling this morning.
A couple years ago, I signed up at the Universal Life Church Monastery, and became an ordained minister of the Universal Life Church. I did this in order to perform the wedding of one of my best friends. A few months ago, one of my former co-workers at Symantec, messaged me to see if I could still do weddings. He and his long time partner were finally going to get married, and they wanted to get married at one of their favorite places to go…Disneyland.
The problem with getting married at Disneyland is that its not allowed. Sure you can get married at one of the hotels…starting at $10,000 for the official Disneyland wedding experience. Even then, you can’t get married inside the park at that rate.
So my friend asked if I’d be willing to perform a “rogue” wedding inside the park. It would be just the two of them, a witness and myself. I was more than glad to help out, so it was just a matter of my friend figuring out the date.
The date was finally set for May 5th and I took the afternoon off from work. Because of a last minute change of schedule, Alicia wasn’t able to come with to be the witness, so my friend Noelle stood in. We got to the park around 3pm and headed in to find a good location to perform the ceremony. But first we had to stop and get some Mickey ear’s to complete the dress code. We ended up finding a nice quiet spot next to the Thunder Mountain Ride (which was closed for maintenance), on a wooden bridge overlooking a pond (with turtles sunning on the shore). The ceremony was fairly quick, just the vows (read off of the Bride’s iPhone), and the exchange of rings. A few people caught on and cheered when it was over (and the possible staff member that walked by ignored it).
After the ceremony, we got some celebratory lemonade (enhanced with some adult water) to toast the happy couple, and then explored the park until closing.
After the parks closed, we returned to their hotel to sign the papers (and make it official), and then had dinner at the mexican restaurant at Downtown Disney to celebrate both the wedding and have Cinco de Mayo margharitas!
Even the Pidgins don’t like the rain in So. Cal. Its been raining all week in LA. And not just the normal barely a shower type of rain, but close to a half of a years average rain fall in a week kind of rain. Lots of streets have flooded and mud slides are happening all over the fire ravaged mountains on the east side of LA. A little rain is good (at least in my opinion), but the rain we’ve had this week is a little more than the environment can handle down here. Most of it is just going to run off down the river beds into the ocean and not help the drought conditions anyway.
While looking for information on a different non-profit service org today, I came across the new site of the Episcopal Urban Intern Program (EUIP). For those of you that don’t know, applying to the EUIP in 2007 led to me moving down to Los Angeles in August of 2007, though not as a participant in the EUIP. One of the reasons I wasn’t selected was because of my age. The EUIP is designed for folks approx 20-30 years old. I was turning 31 in Auguest of 2007 (when it would have begun). The program directors job was to choose good candidates who would have a good shot of forming a good community. The interns that were selected were all between 21 and 24 that year (if I remember correctly). I knew when I applied though, that I was pushing the age range, so I wasn’t too bummed out. Plus I ended up getting offered a different opportunity to intern in Los Angeles through the Episcopal Church. While that internship didn’t end up working out as well as I’d hoped it would, it was still a valuable experience for me.
This year, another one of my friends was accepted into a new intern program affiliated with the Campus Ministry at Cal State – Channel Islands…the Abundant Table Farm Project. She luckily still fit under the 30 yr old ceiling most of the intern programs have.
Anyway, all this got me thinking about those of us in our 30s or 40s (or more) that are searching for ourselves, our spirituality, our intentionality. Where can we participate in these kind of things? I know my age group is more likely to be more settled into family life or a career (though maybe less so into careers in the current state of the economy), but there are many of us that are still searching for our vocation…or a vocational change. Where do we go to find our community now that we are out of school?
I think this is something that I’ll add to my list to explore in the next year.
What’s this? Things have suddenly gotten busy. Both in my off time and at work. So I’m running a little behind on my end of the year post. But tonight, I’m sitting down with some Yogurtland and finally getting it out here on the blog.
the wrap-up:
I finished my year working as a lay minister at USC in May.
I worked at a coffee shop (very part-time)…a first experience.
I worked as an executive assistant for just over 2.5 months (during which my exec “left” the company)…another first experience.
I finished the year (and am still) working as a supply chain planning analyst…again, a first experience.
I lived in three different apartments.
I didn’t make it back to Oregon until Christmas (making it a full year away).
I read more books than last year (by one)
I discovered lots of free (or inexpensive) things to do in LA.
Like a bunch of movies screened for free, sometimes months before they opened to the general public.
I reconnected with a few old friends.
Married one of my friends (by performing the ceremony, not getting married myself)
All in all, it was a good year. After 1.5 years, I’ve got a small group of good friends. I even kind of like LA a little.
This coming year I’d like to:
Read more books than last year.
Practice yoga regularly
Improve my diet (partially by getting rid of the fast food habit I fell into while working at USC)
